When the “flamboyant, maestro at the helm of Television South West” retired in 1992 he did not simply ride off into the sunset with cigar in one hand and champagne flute in the other but instead lived up to his reputation.

As “unstoppable Harry Turner” and wrote three collections of military poetry, an autobiography of life growing up in London’s Fulham and two books of short stories.

This month his latest work, Zen and the Art of Gentle Retirement is published by Janus Publishing Ltd.

Laugh-out-loud funny, this delightful little book is an essential guide to how to deal with the little things life throws up now that one is retired. For example, Wife Swapping:

“Or even husband-swapping, it matters not what gender is on offer, there
is a golden rule about this nefarious practice. If you are one of those
rare types who goes to suburban parties where such activities take place
and some jerk offers to swap his wife with you, don’t be offended, but
don’t offer your own in exchange. Oh no, that would be silly. Say you
would be glad to take his missus in return for that old studio couch or
black-and-white TV set you’ve had in the attic for twenty years. He might
just accept and bingo, you’ve got yourself a free home-help to alleviate
your own dear spouse’s domestic burdens.”

From Ageing to Armpits, Back pain to Bowels and Odours to Orgies, Turner takes us on an A-Z journey through the unorthodox rules of retirement.

But be careful, this new title comes with a warning,

“If you don’t like home truths or are excessively PC, don’t read on.
You’ve wasted your money. This book will only upset you. Stop right here.
Sorry. For the rest of you still reading, sit back, loosen your clothing, put
your teeth in a glass on a table next to you and read on, slowly, but try to
avoid moving your lips at the same time, it looks so senile.

About the Author
Harry Turner was born in 1935 and he has had thirteen books published, including Growing Up In Fulham and Urban Legends by Janus Publishing, as well as three books of military history, Against all Hazards, Poems of Nelson’s Navy and Wrapped in Whirlwinds, with Spellmount Limited. He was the Managing Director of Television South West from 1985 to 1992, a Director of ITN News from 1987 to 1992 and a director of The Prince of Wales Trust (South West). He is also a great-grandfather.
Reviews for other titles by Harry Turner:

“He is a wonderful writer…a most miraculous read.” Jilly Cooper about A Frenzy of Indifference.

“Harry Turner’s verse has the earthiness of soldier’s thoughts and talk, the cheerfulness and prejudice that are their constant companions on the march and in draughty bivouac; also the imaginings of others.” The Times about Poems of the Crimean War.

“Wellington despised the poets of his day, especially Byron and Shelley, but he’d have loved Harry.” Andrew Roberts, Literary Review about Against All Hazards: Poems of the Peninsular War.

“…an important social document and both entertaining and touching to read.” The Catholic Herald about Growing Up in Fulham

“Harry Turner is the master of the short story” Herbert  Van Thal

Zen and the Art of Gentle Retirement is published by Janus Publishing Company Ltd. www.januspublishing.co.uk and is available at £8.99 in major bookshops and online retailers across the country. ISBN 978-1- 85756-760-1